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I'm in Love With an E-Girl

de Wilbur Soot

Well, it's 2:45PM
Wake up from snoring, open DMs
Can of Red Bull by the bed
Vape is charged and Snapchat's read
What's popping?
What's popping?

She's beauty, she's grace
She has a profile picture of an anime girl's face
Just a single message more
Sends her rubbing up my ethernet cord

I wanna be the guy
That you fall asleep on call with
I'll make you forget
Every guy that came before me
'Cause I like you
And you like my attention
Let's skip to the good bit
Let's consummate our internet connection

I'm in love with an
I'm in love with an
I'm in love with an
With an e-girl
I'm in love with an
I'm in love with an
I'm in love with an
With an e-girl

Mom took away my PS4
So I punched a hole through my bedroom wall
I'm not aggressive
I just ooze masculine passion

Did you know I've also got depression?
I'm self-diagnosed, thought I should mention
I thought you could be the one to fix me

I wanna be the girl
That you fall asleep on call with
Meanwhile, I'll
Find other people to talk with
'Cause you like me
And I think you're a maniac
Let's skip to the good bit
Let's completely block all contact

I'm in love with an
I'm in love with an
I'm in love with an
With an e-girl
I'm in love with an
I'm in love with an
I'm in love with an
With an e-girl

Mom took away my PS4
I've said it so many times before
How can I live on if I keep on collecting
These every little slights and insurrections?
Constant pain in every dimension
My body weeps
Disbelief heads suspension
(I'm in love with a, with an e-girl)

I wanna be the guy
That you find stalking your affections
Your social media scoured
You seek police interventions
'Cause I base my
Ideals on obsessive media
Maybe if I act like them
You'll respond to my DMs

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