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de Lyra Pramuk
You knew I was reckless, so what do you gain
Leaving me freezing at the platform in the rain?
Throwin' your wisdom, yeah, thanks for the pain–
Always predicting I'll burn out by thirty-eight
Alright, I drink, yeah, I spill on my jeans
And my hair changes color like rotating screens
So quit with the lectures, who should I be?
'Cause I'm never enough when I'm only just me
I'm too messy, then I'm dangerously neat
You beg me to hustle, then mock where I've been
I'm too flawless till I open my big mouth
Guess authenticity's not what you allow
Yeah, I'm too clever, then I'm dumb as hell
You hate tears unless they fit your little schedule
I could spin in a thousand masks on display–
But you'd hate me anyway
Takes you forever to send back a line
One message back wouldn't cross the line
I unwind with a glass, maybe two on the side
But you're lit up at dawn, getting stoned, getting high
Then creeping back home, not a word to my face
While I'm tripping on laundry thrown all over the place
We're both flawed as hell, but here's what I know
You'll always find bullets, and I'm your scapegoat
I'm too messy, then I'm weirdly OCD
You scream: Go be useful! Then ask where I sleep
I'm too perfect till I slip and speak my truth
When I'm just me, it's a problem for you
I'm too clever, then I'm thick as stone
You hate sorrow when it's real, unless it's staged for show
I could morph into anything, switch by the day–
But you'd hate me anyway
You hate the way I laugh
You hate the way I breathe
You hate the different faces–
But they're still all me
So tell me what's left when perfection's a joke?
I'll light up my flaws just to watch your control choke
Yeah, I'm too messy, then freakishly clean
You hand me your orders, then complain where I've been
I'm too perfect till I open my big mouth
But I want to be me–is that not allowed?
Too clever, too stupid, too sweet, too loud
No matter the version, it's never allowed
I could be everyone, I could be no one
But you'll hate me anyway
You'll hate me anyway
You'll hate me anyway
Hey, hey