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The Wake of My Will

de Light This City

A flash brighter than lightning overhead,
but my town is asleep
so they don't see my father coming home.
I imagine him walking in the middle of this night
all the way back to us.
He likes to look up at the sky as he
steps out onto familiar ground.
Now he's rounding our corner,
now he's walking through the door,
he's walking through the door.

And my mother with her deadened eyes,
she comes alive.

"Don't go," I plead even though I know
I know his strong love for us both
won't keep him from the sky.
I know it tears him up inside to say,
"It's only one more time."
He knows it's just a lie he wants to believe.
"I need the stars flying by me,
the earth afloat, above or below, it doesn't matter where,
just as long as it isn't right here.

I'll be back before you know it and then
I promise you I'll be home for good"

"Let me go with you" I have begged ever since I was a child
I know just what he's going to say:

"I don't want you to end up like me,
aching between the mystery of new planets to be explored
and the comfort of this ancient discovery beneath our feet.
You'll struggle to give up that which you love
and it's not easy.
Son, just please promise me you won't become like me."

I just nod and let go even though I know
I know his strong love for us both
won't keep him from the sky.
I know it tears him up inside to say,
"It's only one more time."


A flash as bright as a rocket ship exploding,
but my town is asleep
so they don't see my father die.
I imagine him falling into the sun
and I look up at the sky.
"If only you would have stayed this time."
Now he's rounding the corner,
now he's walking through the door,
please, just walk through that door.

When I asked him how many ways
one could die in space, he said "a million.
they call them traveling graves.
If they can't find you, then they can't bury you."
Imagine how it feels to envy the stars and
resent the sun…
Morning won't ever be the same.

You never kept your promise, so I'm not keeping mine
Wake me at sunset so I can say goodbye.

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