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Thumbsucker

de Jenny Hval

In my dream, you are slippery
My interest grows immediately
You have seaweed between your fingers, lips and limbs

Amphibious, androgynous
Amphibious
Ninety-eight percent water

I try to write love songs
But my words remain in my hands
And my hands fall to the floor

Somewhere in the distance something hurts
I dream i have a lover made out of twigs
I snap his lips, snap his lips when we kiss

Yes you’re here
The way it goes
This world is me

The dream doesn’t fade, it keeps worrying me
I try not to hurt you, but in my dream
The twigs keep breaking

I toot so gently but they snap
And when you open your mouth to speak,
You make no sound
Silently gobbling up black sap

I realize i haven’t even seen you up close
Only from below
In the dream you’re a saint
And i am behind smoke

I try to write love songs
But rid every word
I can hear the twigs breaking
Somewhere in the distance something hurts

The next stage is
I who break
It’s a clear spring day
And a fueled sky
Ninety-eight percent blue

A day i’ll find myself down in black things:
Coffee, razors, raw chocolate

I can feel my bones
Burn to gold
My blood burns to oil
Black self, i’m becoming you

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