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Agoraphobic

de Caskitt

I’ve become agoraphobic
Confined to the cells I’ve built inside my head
I’m never going on the outside ever again
The sun is shining through the curtains
Oh, it’s a beautiful day outside I’m sure
But I’m just gonna have to trust you
And take you at your word
Because it’s comfortable in here
Just me and debilitating fear
My self-security blanket warms
As I know the end is near

So please don’t take my pain away
It’s all I got to keep me warm and safe
Armageddon’s approaching, it’s fair to say
So, board up the windows and lock the doors
I’m not going outside anymore
Unless I’m dragged kicking
And screaming, I’m staying indoors

There’s a clock upon the nightstand
Programmed to notify me of another day
The weather really doesn’t matter when it’s always cold and gray
I hit the snooze while I’m sleeping
Un-rested, adjust myself accordingly
Pace back and forth three times rinse
Repeat, scrub until it’s clean
But it’s comfortable in here
Just me and debilitating fear
By self-help medicating my future’s looking fucking clear

I’ve lost my mind this time it’s somewhere I swear
I’ve lost my mind this time, I can’t find it anywhere
So please don’t take my pain away

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