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In the Papers

de Benny Hill

Annie from brighton once ordered a steak weighing nine and a quarter pounds
The butcher, he said: Will you take it, ma’am, or shall I send it ‘round?
She said: No, I just want to look at it, ‘cause I’ve been dieting like a chump
And that’s what I’ve lost, and I just want to see what it looks like in one lump

Agatha’s passion was baked beans, it’s a meal that she always enjoys
But she’s heard if you eat too many, you might make an embarrassing noise
Now, she eats more than ever, enough to make all of you sick
And she washes it down with pineapple juice, ‘cause she likes hawaiian music
But I sit here quietly singing, with my guitar on my knee
For no matter who calls or whatever befalls, nothing worries me

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